Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Randomize
