You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
