I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
