Dual....:-)
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
