i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
