Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
