Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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