I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
