woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
