Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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