Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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