rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
