I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
