the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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