I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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