Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He passed out mid-signature
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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