guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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