She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
