i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
