We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
