i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
