your thong is hanging out like whoa
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
