i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
