just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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