Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
