This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
When did angry sex become our thing?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
