Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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