someone threw a dead crab at me
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
No subtext here. People are naked.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
