Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize