Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I have post one night stand depression
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