what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
