after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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