Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
