whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize