im holly from the hills drunk
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
