i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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