how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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