i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
