question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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