Don't you send me to vm
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
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