May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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