Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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