You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
