"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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