u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I can't turn off my feet"
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
