actually, I'm a sock model
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
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