? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize