i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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