I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize
