AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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