You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
